tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6905236167079601771.post2964731978359004525..comments2023-12-25T11:13:04.495+00:00Comments on Seraphic Singles: Don't Be His Cooky-Baking SlaveSeraphichttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06251504033428511090noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6905236167079601771.post-36872381806501165772013-09-17T13:10:04.933+01:002013-09-17T13:10:04.933+01:00Polish cooking is easy. What you do is get a Polis...Polish cooking is easy. What you do is get a Polish recipe, carefully translated into English, and then follow it to the letter. (Yes, 3 whole Tablespoons of marjoram is normal.)Then you feed it to homesick Poles. <br /><br />British people keep asking me if I'm not scared to cook Polish food for Polish people. I don't really get this. Maybe it's from their experience of tea made by Americans or something, or what Americans used to tell them about their coffee. At any rate, Poles have never been rude about my cooking, and unlike the British they don't believe in polite lies. <br /><br />I say, cook up some lovely Polish food for Babcia! If she complains, well... Complaining will amuse her. Seraphichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06251504033428511090noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6905236167079601771.post-7561837878237687412013-09-17T12:19:25.376+01:002013-09-17T12:19:25.376+01:00Pearlmusic, I'm sorry about your heartbreak. M...Pearlmusic, I'm sorry about your heartbreak. Men don't really tell me super-personal stuff. One time one of my guy friends tried to tell me about his girlfriend problems. He actually tried to get me to READ AN EMAIL SHE HAD SENT HIM. "No way," I said, and that was that. You know, I really like his girlfriend. She's awesome. And reading her emails is not my business. Also, she used to be a uni tutor of mine.<br /><br />It's so cool that real Polish people read this blog! Because now my Babcia Stories have some context. We have the saying "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach" in English too, and although I've never heard my Babcia come out with that in either English or Polish, she has expressed grandmotherly concern for my lack of housewifely skills (although she hasn't brought it up in awhile).<br /><br />But really, my skills aren't that bad, Babcia! I keep myself and my dwelling place clean. I can cook, and although I don't have a huge repertoire of dishes, I have more than a clue about nutrition. I don't bake though. I haven't lived in a house with a working oven since 2008.<br /><br />I think I'm fine by Australian standards (hey, who wants a kangaroo steak?), but who knows, I'd probably be a dismal failure by Polish cooking standards! :)Julianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6905236167079601771.post-26427242421159667362013-09-17T11:22:23.449+01:002013-09-17T11:22:23.449+01:00Julia: I think Christian women are especially pron...Julia: I think Christian women are especially prone to do such things, as we're encouraged to service, charity and so on. Some women are tempted to show the best of us regarding household, because they think they'll show themselves as marriage material and win men's heart this way. "Przez żołądek do serca", we say in Polish, this meaning "Through stomach to the heart [of a man]".<br /><br />But just as men often pressure to have sex before marriage, women seem to perform other marriage activities before they actually marry and often don't see anything wrong in it because they think it's a very noble thing, unlike premarital sex. <br /><br />I've had this problem too, but not as much with cooking and cleaning, for I never did such things for men I was hoping to marry. My issue is (hopefully, was) being a free "therapist" for them. It was so innocent in my view, as I just wanted to be supportive and prove to be this good girl they'd been waiting for. Needless to say, I ended up heartbroken.<br /><br />My, oh my. Had I realized earlier that I'm doing stuff people are normally paid for, it would have saved me so much pain.Pearlmusicnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6905236167079601771.post-65995242525879328762013-09-17T07:47:34.101+01:002013-09-17T07:47:34.101+01:00TRS, thanks for the explanation (and for politely ...TRS, thanks for the explanation (and for politely ignoring my exasperated tone!). :)<br /><br />Since I'm in my early twenties, most of the men I know are as well. And, like me, many of them still live with their families, which isn't uncommon in Australia, and it's not really seen as weird or as a problem, but I guess I can just wonder what these guys actually do for themselves when they not only live with their mums but have girlfriends hovering about too.<br /><br />Julianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6905236167079601771.post-47861312716854095922013-09-17T01:32:27.197+01:002013-09-17T01:32:27.197+01:00This is only tangentially related, but I can't...This is only tangentially related, but I can't help but remember the advice I received upon starting my business:<br /><br />People NEVER respect what they get for free. Like it, yes, and will *gladly* take everything you offer. 'Cause, hey, free stuff! But respect it and/or you? HIGHLY UNLIKELY.<br /><br />Ironically, as this person advised me, the higher I raised my rates, the better treatment ensued. Self-respect: Use it or lose it! <br /><br />The value and worth you have in yourself and your work sets the stage for how people will treat you. I think that in business, like personal relationships, people want to be with someone who has self-respect. <br /><br />Unfortunately, our culture does not have a lot of healthy messages about respect and so one has to go against the grain, which can be pretty challenging sometimes.<br /><br />Jackienoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6905236167079601771.post-5308414224893120732013-09-17T00:32:06.909+01:002013-09-17T00:32:06.909+01:00Hmm. I'm one of those who went overboard in t...Hmm. I'm one of those who went overboard in the housekeeping department for an ex. <br />In my mind, it was partly because he had a nice place, if only it was clean... I can't stand to see dishes and pans in the sink or on the counter when they could be in the dishwasher! Grr. So I just cleaned it! <br />In retrospect it was partly because, I got laid off from my job about 5 months in to our relationship, and had the time. I also wanted to see that I was a worker, since I was having trouble getting work. <br /><br />Ultimately, he resented what I did for him. Because essentially I was putting myself in the position of wife when he hadn't asked. So there you go. <br />Don't do that. <br /><br />In my defense, he was the first catholic man I had found to date in YEARS, and I was 38 and felt THIS HAS TO BE IT! If I come out of this relationship single I shall be a failure. He must be the one for me. <br /><br />Silly woman. God has something better in store. No idea what, but I know I dodged a bullet not marrying that guy! TRShttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09801686710086039781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6905236167079601771.post-91381671225010305832013-09-16T23:52:58.248+01:002013-09-16T23:52:58.248+01:00I've never heard about young women I know doin...I've never heard about young women I know doing household chores or cooking for young men (unless they're in de facto marriages with, or related to, those men). And actually, the idea of a woman doing household stuff for a guy who isn't her husband (or male relative), even if he is her boyfriend or fiancé, creeps me out a bit.<br /><br />I don't get why girlfriends take their boyfriends shopping to get them shirts or shoes. What is this? Once a friend of mine got herself all worried that her boyfriend might catch a cold if he went out without a coat or something. What the flip is going on here? I'm sorry, I just don't get it. Maybe I'm a heartless cow. If Mr Boyfriend doesn't have a decent pair of shoes or doesn't care if he catches a cold, I don't see why Miss Girlfriend needs to make that her problem.Julianoreply@blogger.com