I'm back. It occurred to me that it is a bit late to start Operation Spiritual Mothers, but it is not too late for us all to remember women who have been motherly to us with actually being our mothers.
Of course our mothers and grandmothers are the most special--most of the time. But there are other women whose help we remember long after they, perhaps, have forgotten us. My first and sixth grade teacher was a Single woman name Marilyn. I don't know if she ever got married. Heck, I don't know if she is still alive. But she was very kind to me, and I have never forgotten her.
So I am sending a virtual bouquet of gerbera daisies to Marilyn in my imagination. And tomorrow at Mass, when I pray for all my readers--especially my Single readers--I will pray for all the spiritual mothers I can remember. And I recommend that all my childless-not-by-choice readers do that, too.
If there is clapping, tell God you're clapping for all those special women who were so good to you, whether or not they had children of their own.
Now feel free to mention the names of women you'd send real bouquets to if you could, and whom you are happy to send imaginary bouquets in my combox. Ladies only, please.
13 comments:
This post made me think of my PhD advisor. Well in the first instance it made me think of another member of my committees whom I greatly admire, someone who, whenever I talk to her, I wish I were more like her. But then I thought of my advisor. Neither is a believer at all, but both have been important role models for me, and I will remember them in my prayers this weekend and in the future.
It's days like these I really appreciate your blog Seraphic. I went to the vigil mass last night and yes not only did all the mothers have to stand but they had to go to the front for a prayer and a small gift. I gritted my teeth and turned to my friend (a 70yr old nun) and commented she should join them as a spiritual mother (she certainly is one to me). She smiled and commented back that I also should join them because as a teacher I am mother to all those in my classes. I felt blessed! I'm not so worried most of the time about having my own children even though I'm in my late-ish 30s as I feel I am a bit of mother to children in my class.
There's a lot to be said for spiritual motherhood.
When I was a sensitive and awkward teenager, my piano teacher was somewhat of a spiritual mother to me. I don't know how deep her faith was, as she never spoke of it, but she lived it and a motherly vocation in the way she motivated me, listened to me when I spilled over with emotion, and was always a quiet, reliable rock to turn to.
My completely non-believer single aunt and my long-time-single-happily-married-at-45-godmother are two such other women who have inspired and helped me at numerous times when I needed more womanly courage and advice.
Spiritual mothers are amazing! And I love this idea, Seraphic!
My mother's Godson sends her a "Happy Godmother's Day" card every year. He has six brothers and sisters and every year they all send cards to their Godmothers, thanking them for their Spiritual Motherhood.
I would like to send a spiritual bouquet to all the wonderful women who have helped and guided me through this difficult time.
Oh, Katie, seriously?!?!?
I'm glad you turned to your nun friend! What a beautiful conversation, and how entirely in the spirit of Saint Edith Stein and Blessed John Paul II.
I would send a boquet to two mentors, D and C. D was a model of grace, generosity, and a steely core. She was, as a friend of mine said, "the nicest smart person I've ever met," and I aspire to be like her. She died seven years ago -- I can't believe it's been that long -- and I miss her very much. C was a seraphic single: poised, competent, articulate and kind, who came along at just the right moment and was incredibly encouraging to me.
When I was at church last year on this Sunday, the well-meaning usher handed me a flower, telling me "well, you'll have kids some day." He meant well, but it stung, as it is less and less likely that I will. But I am conspicuously the only youngish single person in my little parish, and I'm sure he just didn't know what to do.
This is such a positive exercise, Auntie S. Thanks.
I just saw a lovely Facebook meme that I thought was perfect -- I don't know if the link will work so I'll paste it in and then also the quotation:
lovely Facebook meme
It shows flowers and the description reads:
"If you've been a happy, relaxed, no-worries mother this year, these flowers are for you. If you've been a worn out, stressed out, wrung out mother this year, these flowers are ESPECIALLY for you. If you aren't a mother, but long to be, these flowers are TOTALLY for you. And if you had a less-than-wonderful mother, or your mother is no longer living, or you want more than anything to be the best mother you can be to your kids, but aren't sure you're there yet, THE WHOLE GARDEN IS YOURS, beloved." -- Liz Curtis Higgs
I thought that was really nice. I'm a May baby so I'm used to my birthday being overshadowed by Mothers' Day, Communions, etc., which is fine (I just like birthdays regardless of getting to be the focus or not), but I was very luck to receive many well-wishes through Facebook, and I just got home to my folks', so I think I'm inured to any excesses that may occur at Mass this evening. :-)
~Nzie
You are more the age of my sister, but here you go!
Your blog has meant a lot to me over the years, and I really don't have another spiritual mother.
Aw! Thank you! Virtual flowers for ME! :-D
as a mom of many I just want to pop in and say that there are times when we NEED that blessing, and I am very grateful for it, though if they did a special mothers blessing at another time I would be fine. I am very sorry for the pain that it causes non-mothers, but another reason I do like it is that there are probably mothers in the congregation who may be considering aborting, and I pray especially for them during that blessing. There are also mothers who have several children but have also lost children to sids or other causes (my sister and I each lost two) and I think those mothers need prayers and blessings to get through difficult events like that. Thanks for hearing another side! I do enjoy your blog and the comments, and recommend it to singles I know.
Nzie, thank you for sharing that. I LOVE it!
All the nuns who helped raise me while in boarding school are like spiritual mothers to me, so I should "send" them a spiritual bouquet to all of them, and most especially Sr. Gertrude, Sr. Philomena, and Sr. Alphonsa.
I gained another spiritual mother by moving to Germany and living with an extremely kind and generous woman who has integrated me into her family. I gave her a card and a book by an author she likes, especially since I was not able to do much for my own mother at home this year.
Thank you very much, Dorothy, for the idea. I'm sending red roses to Ela, who is a nun and the most wonderful spiritual mother and leader God's sent me.
And in the case of Poland, it isn't too late to tart the idea. Our Mother's Day's on May 26.
Katie, I'm of your age and a teacher, too. I've never thought of myself as a spiritual mother who, in fact, I am for my students and for my young friends. Thank you for your anecdote.
Teresa of Kraków
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