Happy Saint Valentine's Day to my beloved army of readers, Single, married and consecrated! Valentine's greetings also to the Eavesdroppers who, as they persist in reading my girly-girl blog, must be in love with me. I send virtual chocolate to all the girls, and I kiss all the Eavesdroppers in the middle of their foreheads.
For as much as we complain about the red, white and pink, the tender sentiments and expectations they suggest beat the sex-without-strings cynicism growing in the West. Although I am flippant about boyfriends-and-girlfriends stuff, I believe in men and women taking care of, and being careful for, each other in dozens of ways, beginning with the way we all dress in public. (Incidentally, I'm not just talking about modesty here; I'm talking about presenting an attractive appearance.) As you know, I don't think marriage-minded Single women should ever do household tasks for unrelated Single men or deliberately court them with baking. There are better ways to show that you, personally, are not interested in prolonging the war between the sexes.
That sounds like a subject for my next post.
Actually, in that spirit, this may be the one day of the year that I feel you might bake cookies for boys, as long as you share the cookies with everybody, not just Mr Cute. I very much feel that Valentine's Day should be one of those days in which you give (something small) without expecting anything back except thanks. That way, if you do get anything, from anyone, you will be surprised and pleased. For example, I hid B.A.'s valentine and gift in the Historical House before I left for Canada, not saying anything about it. And to my surprise and pleasure, I discovered when I got home last night that B.A. had contrived to send me a funny homemade card containing a snowdrop.
A snowdrop! YAY! Because the essence of romance is not STUFF, not pricey goods, but shared jokes and rituals. That's what we're talking about, Eavesdroppers. Not STUFF. Not your wallets. Not slavery to our moods. Just a loving gesture to remind us why we like, or fell in love, with you in the first place.*
Meanwhile, a final reminder that the Ladies-only Seraphic Singles Toronto Valentine's Meet-up is today at five-thirty until about seven-thirty at the same place I've been telling people on request. If you went last year, it's at the same place. If you suddenly can go but don't know where it is, send me an email this morning. (I won't be able to check my email later, so ask now.) It's completely inter-faith and ecumenical, by the way, so don't expect all the other gals to be Catholic. We may be excitingly diverse!
*That is, if we are balanced, generous, sensible women. I admit that women are not perfect and some of us do indeed get overwrought on Valentine's Day and some of us are not actually in love with you which is why we are dissatisfied with ANYTHING you do. And I am truly sorry for that. If small and thoughtful doesn't cut it, then there may be something wrong and it is time for a serious conversation involving a lot of listening and clarification. Sometimes women are in the wrong, and yes it hurt to admit that.