Saturday, 13 August 2011

Singles and Adventure

So Hilary does not like to be defined by her Singleness.

"Why not?" I said. "You could even make a career out of it, like I was going to do before I, ah, er, got married."

But although Hilary is happy to define herself by sex, nationality and religion, she refuses to do it by marital status.

Which is too bad because when I was still trying to find a famous Single woman for my blog every day, it really bugged me when I couldn't find out if living famous women were Single or not. Sometimes it seems to be treated as a tremendous secret. Is Sally Ride married? How dare I ask?

I wish Single (and by that I mean REALLY Single, i.e. not sharing bed and not in a religious order) celebrities would say so, so that Singles would have more models. It bothers me that women (in particular) seem to put their lives on hold or don't take advantage of the career opportunities they have now because they think doing something adventurous (not sinful, I'm not saying sinful, I'm saying adventurous) will somehow jinx their chances of getting married.

The amusing thing is that one of my best friends put her foot down when I announced I was going to Scotland to meet British readers. She thought the money would be better spent on attractive clothes, and she said my Scottish trip proved I really didn't want to get married after all.

Ah ha ha ha!

Anyway, I am thinking about Hilary (who does not define herself by her Single state) who said Yes when her boss suggested she cover the Vatican for his popular news site. Off she went to a foreign country, where she doesn't speak the language, and she now lives in a beautiful flat near the beautiful sea, and she has lots of friends and fun.

Yes, she also has cancer, and it is one of a Single woman's worst nightmares that she get sick with no man or family around to help her. However, Hilary's friends, colleagues and readers have all pitched in--which just goes to show that even then a Single woman can be okay.

6 comments:

Meredith said...

re: the attractive clothes, I love buying attractive clothes, but actual studies have been done to show that spending money on experiences is more satisfying and conducive to happiness than spending money on things. Ooo, Seraphic, you make me want to start planning a trip! I think I shall go somewhere next summer...

Seraphic Spouse said...

Good! Travel is a great way to stretch oneself and stock up furniture for the memory and collect grist for the writing mill!

some guy on the street said...

I would imagine that boys do well from travelling, too. Hmmm...

Maggie said...

The attitude of "don't travel too much or go away anywhere exciting or 'have adventures' because you might miss opportunities to meet A Man at home!" seems quite counter-intuitive to me. Perhaps it's because I live in a small town, but sitting in the same place for long seems to have quite the opposite effect; if the men looking for brides haven't found a gal yet, a NCG might need to change her geography (even temporarily, through travel/pilgrimage/fellowship at another school/etc) to *increase* her odds of meeting new people who may eventually introduce her to a spouse, or at least men eligible to become such.

MaryJane said...

Thanks, this was exactly what I needed to hear today!

(PS: Janet Smith is "famous," at least in the Catholic world, and she is single. She's even given a few talks on being single. If you haven't already featured her, I think that would be great.)

Lena said...

Yes, she also has cancer, and it is one of a Single woman's worst nightmares that she get sick with no man or family around to help her. However, Hilary's friends, colleagues and readers have all pitched in--which just goes to show that even then a Single woman can be okay.

Yes, that certainly a single woman's worst fear, and I am glad Hilary has help.