Saturday 10 May 2014
We Are All Mothers of One Kind or Another
I am sick & in bed very tired but have just remembered that so many of you are going to have your spiritual motherhood completely ignored at Holy Mass tomorrow. If you discover yourself having to sit when the ladies with (living) children stand, please remember married mom and fellow reader Sheila stubbornly sitting in solidarity with you.
Then please pray for each other and the ladies whose children have died, abuse them, neglect them or are in prison.
I will pray especially for all my readers who, like me, have never given birth. God bless you,and may our priests eventually stop dividing us women from each other at Holy Mass on Mother's Day. We are all called to be mothers, physical or spiritual, and sometimes both.
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14 comments:
Get better, Aunty!
And that is why I will drag myself to an early mass at a convent where most of the women in attendance will be (cloistered) spiritual mothers.
I was pinned down on going to the Byzantines tomorrow because it's also my graduation (why this college does it on Mothers' Day every year is a mystery) but whatever the women get, my classmate and I are getting some sort of blessing so that will at least be nice. I think mainly I'll be more sad that my mom couldn't come (just not feasible, and I know she feels badly about it). But my grandma can, so I'll try to focus on how nice it is to be a daughter and granddaughter to two incredible women.
Also, I get to wear a medieval-looking hat with my robe. Hats are usually a big plus in my book.. I imagine if dear Father waxes eloquent for a long time on mothers, getting to wear a hat later will be a big pick me up. :-)
It was Mothers' Day today in my part of the world, and I went to Sunday Mass. Wow. It was the most Mothers' Day-centric Mass I've ever been to. Pre-Mass Mothers' Day introduction at the lectern, kids doing the readings, kids handing out flowers to the mothers in attendance, homily all about mothers, bad Marian hymns and a poxy song about mothers.
I sort of don't mind that much that Mothers' Day gets a mention, but in general my feeling is that since Mothers' Day is not a church feast day it should be left out of the liturgy. Families celebrate it in their own ways later (or not at all).
In the end, I spent Mothers' Day with my father and his mother, after going to Mass with my mother.
Nzie, congratulations on graduating!! I hope to report similar news in a little over a year!
Mothers were only mentioned in the prayers of the faithful with thanks for their sacrifices.
Aged P
I was gratified that the priest mentioned spiritual mothers. I was not so gratified that he ignored the beautiful readings of Good Shepherd Sunday (one of my favorites!) to wax poetic about Mother's Day. Mother's Day is a secular holiday .... I hate the takeover of church by Mother's Day as much as I hate the Fourth of July being the theme of the Mass (which is ALWAYS is). America the Beautiful, lovely as it is, isn't really a church song.
I feel I have let you all down, though, because I was not able to make my protest! We left the church early because the kids were acting up and the priest had set off into a long "announcement time" about persecution in the Middle East ..... and his descriptions of rapes and burnings were not child-appropriate at all. I certainly did pray for everyone here at church today.
My husband posted a beautiful facebook status when we got home, which I just have to share:
"Happy Mothers Day to all mothers, but especially to those often overlooked during today's festivities: mothers who have lost children, adoptive mothers, godmothers, women who mentor and serve as spiritual advisers, and those women who want to have children but are unable to do so. Motherhood is no less true for being less visible."
Go, him! And he tagged all the women we know who have been spiritual mothers to us, like our elderly Single choir director and the motherly married-but-childless lady who "adopted" us when we were first married.
Time to send around my thank-yous to the spiritual mothers in my life. :) You first, Auntie -- thanks for your ministry; it makes such a difference to so many.
Thank you, Sheila!
I hope Aged P got the flowers I wired!
Got a nice sermon half on the Gospel and half on mothers.
At the end, when the whole congregation was standing, the priest asked the mothers to bow their heads for a blessing. There was no applause. It was quite unobtrusive compared to the typical Mother's Day festivities.
I don't mind the applauding of mothers at Mass personally, even though I'm not one. However, something that does bother me is the idea that someone "fulfilling their vocation" is somehow better than someone who hasn't found it yet.
And I guess, maybe it is a similar thing. But anyways, my mom gave me the best affirmation today, when I called her and said "Happy Mother's Day" she said, "Happy Mother's Day to you too!" I was surprised. She said she thinks of those I work with as my kids (I work in youth and young adult ministry for my diocese). I think of them that way too. It's nice that someone else does. . .maybe I haven't found my "VOCATION" but I have found a mission in life, a small one perhaps but fulfilling.
Okay, in fairness, I should state that 'women who have been important to us' were also mentioned at Mass. But, like Sheila, I do feel that Mothers' Day and all secular holidays should be left out of church. Perhaps it shouldn't annoy me, but I do feel a little annoyed even when 'Advance Australia Fair' is sung at church around Australia Day (they don't even sing the verse about Christ, not that anyone does these days). And ANZAC Day? Yeah, I feel the same about that, although usually it's not dwelt upon in Mass. I guess I just feel that we are Catholics (you know, universal) and not 'Australian Catholics'. I don't think there needs to be any nationalistic focus in church.
Thanks, Julia! And good luck with your last year!
Bonus from Liturgy yesterday - there was a baptism! I've never been to a Byzantine baptism before (of course it's very similar but there are some differences that are quite beautiful). The baby girl cried almost the whole time. The priest declared them happy tears. (The priest is generally adorable.)
The mention of mothers was there but in general there's less futzing with the DL than the Roman missal.
Happy mother's day to you all!
I agree about the secular take over of the mass. The priest at my parents church just tried to do it all- (long) homily on the good shephard followed by a "few" words about mothers, flowers for Mary, etc, etc. With the result being that every biological or adoptive mother of small children was incredibly antsy because mass was an hour and a half long!
Well, I bought my sisters chocolate for mother's day- my sister-in-law who is pregnant with #4, my youngest sister who has taught for four years even though she doesn't much like it (she is married but doesn't have kids (yet, God-willing), and my other sister who has volunteered with youth groups since she left college (she is not married and wants nothing more than to be a stay at home mom; she teared up when I gave her the disgusting looking smore chocolate that I knew she would like).
Two things on spiritual motherhood to read:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/seth-adam-smith/dread-mothers-day_b_5296940.html
http://www.piercedhands.com/i-have-kids/
I'm glad our priest didn't mention spiritual motherhood. If they can't recognize our gifts to the church and our community any of the other 364 days a year, then I shan't have the title plunked on me as a consolation prize on Mother's Day.
Lovely as it is, spiritual motherhood doesn't make up for experiencing pregnancy, childbirth, nursing and just plain parenthood.
Maybe that's my personal peeve - but the inability to fulfill my body's destiny is a real sore spot. Probably because as a skinny, flat chested, non curvey woman, my culture has told me I'm not "real" to begin with. Not being able to perform as a woman is really painful.
Hmm. While Mother's Day celebrations at Mass rankle me for all the reasons given, I always thought of 4th of July celebrations at Mass as a chance to pray for my country. Even "America the Beautiful" I think of as a prayer that God will shed His grace on America - which needs His grace quite a lot these days! I do admit that I'm sad I never get to celebrate the feast of Pier Giorgio Frassatti liturgically, however.
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