Wednesday, 24 February 2010

What I Miss

One of the problems with writing for Singles when you're married, I've discovered, is that people say to you, "But you're married." It drives me crazy because, like, you know, I know I'm married. But before I was married I was Single. I was Single for a loooong time. I had a whole Single life going on. And I decided to spend it at grad school and, when I was done with grad school, living with my parents and writing a lot. And I enjoyed living with my parents. My parents are cool.

Eventually someone might eventually ask me what I miss about the Single life. I hope somebody does, actually, because it would be a recognition that being Single (and sleeping alone) is not outrageously terrible 24/7. I hope I wouldn't turn into a pillar of salt, though, like Lot's Wife. Poor Lot's Wife looked back nostalgically at her homeland, and whammo. Since then turning into a pillar of salt has been a metaphor for getting stuck in the past.

I definitely won't get stuck in the past because I am loving my present, poppets. It rocks. I have a cute husband and live in one of the coolest apartments in Scotland. I live just outside of one of the most beautiful cities in Europe, and there are several boxes of books sitting in an office in Toronto, each book with my maiden name across it. It rules to be me. But I will admit to missing one or two or ten things from my Single Life, so I will list them here so that you can ponder what it is you love about your Single Life.

1. I miss living with Mummy and Daddy.

2. I miss seeing my brothers and sisters and nephews on a regular basis.

3. I miss my ole buddy Trish.

4. I miss my buddies known collectively as Les Girls.

5. I miss wandering into the Catholic Register offices to chat and hear the stories behind the stories.

6. I miss wandering into my old theology school and seeing what's going on with my former profs.

7. I miss calling up my buddy X when I'm having a crisis, and then calling up Y when talking to X doesn't do the trick.

8. I miss coffee, but that's mostly because I gave it up for Lent. However, I also miss the coffee machine in my parents' kitchen, and its massive thermos-jug, and pouring Tim Horton's coffee into a mug while my mother shouts, "Is that MY mug?", and staring out the window to see if there are any blue jays or cardinals hanging out in the backyard.

9. I miss family life in general. My mother-in-law lives up North and my uncle-in-law lives down South, and that's it for my in-laws. For someone who comes from a family of 7 plus grandmothers, it's kind of weird not to have family around.

10. I miss getting my monthly paycheque in the mail and putting into the bank all by myself. This may sound odd, but it is the truth.

11. I miss Mum doing all the laundry and most of the cooking. I agree that this is infantile. Just being honest here.

12. I miss Graziano's cappuccinos at The Annex Live.

13. I am livid there's no point in my applying to join the Toronto Temperence Society (a private club for cocktail drinkers).

14. I miss getting actual paper copies of the Catholic Register and cutting out my columns for my scrapbook.

As you can see, most of the things and people I miss I'm missing not because I'm married, but because my marriage means living in Scotland. But I won't be nagging at B.A. to pick up sticks and move to Canada because our life is here, and we love it. You'll notice that I didn't say anything about missing the architecture, urban sprawl, the subway and Toronto's teeming millions. Oh, wait, though:

15. I would kill for some decent Chinese food.


オテモヤン said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Seraphic said...

Comment moderation going back up. What a world.

Pelicanus said...

There is a dearth of good chinese food in Edinburgh?

berenike said...

Rainbow Arch, Morrison Street.

Seraphic said...

Rainbow Arch, Morrison Street. I will investigate! I am dying for some pork dumplings. DYING!

Annie said...

I grew up in Buffalo, NY, where my parents and much of my extended family still are, and have been running away from the rust belt from the time I started college. But I miss Tim Hortons and every time I see some evidence of my beloved coffee/donut place in NYC, where I now live, I cannot contain my excitement. I miss being able to stop by Tim Hortons, but the Tim Hortons mug I pour my coffee into each morning means that I at least get to pretend. :D

Seraphic said...

I found Morrison Street and saw Rainbow Arch from the bus!!! So I will go there soon to see if it can compare to Toronto's Chinese cuisine scene.

Sheila said...

I miss:

1. Sleeping alone. Never thought I'd miss that one! Usually I don't, but when my husband accidentally sticks his elbow in my face at 1 a.m., I do.

2. My cooking and grocery shopping being WAY simpler. I generally bought one bag of groceries to last for over a week!

3. My girlfriends. So much.

4. My maiden name. It had quite a ring to it, and I just liked being called "Miss." No Ms. for me!

5. Being able to see my toes. And all the other "I really really miss not being pregnant" stuff. Because being pregnant is not all roses.

6. Listening to my own music all the time.

7. Being able to go out whenever I wanted and not tell anyone where I was going or when I'd be back.

So, single people -- enjoy those things! They may not last!

Alisha said...


I know there is a TH in NYC - I saw it and stopped dead in my tracks when I was there last time! Are you still in Manhattan? I hope I'll see you at my show on March 17th!

In fact there are apparently 11 locations -
Oh Canada!!

Anna said...

Nice list!! If it's any consolation, I would love to up and move to Scotland!! It looks so beautiful from pictures....the vast expanse of hills and greenery.

There's no Chinese food in Scotland? Really?

Bethany J. said...


I LOVE your blog! I am slightly addicted. I love your writing style and your humor. God bless you and your work!

Seraphic said...


Thank you!

Seraphic said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Pelicanus said...

Karen Wong's in the Southside is also another great one - and Karen, the manageress, is a hoot!

Seraphic said...

Thank you! Little does B.A. know that visits to Chinese restaurants are occuring in our near future!