Friday 10 January 2014

sharlot deesishun

hello it is me the inner child and i am lyk a sole in torment becoz my owter adult is now on the 5-2 dyet. yesterday she just kut owt all added shugar--i told her dryed figs and klementyns doant have shugar rofl--but now today she is kalorie cownting. as hewvert wud say wat fresh hel is this? 500 kalories how am i supposed to ryte? i doant cayr if well eet 1500 tomorrow wat abowt now? and there is no use telling me friday shud be a day of fasting anyway becuz la la la la la la im not listning. freeking polish lessons and now fad dyets i did not kom bak for this but for fun stuff and choklit.

forchoonatly my wilting speerits (peotry) hav seen restored by FAN ART. this fan art koms from my no. 1 fan notburga and illustrayts that tender moment wen hewbert sat down to coldbluddedly ask proodens to marrie him in a marrij of konveenyens and reelized he loved her and was not guid enuff for her even tho hitherto he thot all weemen beneeth him becuz of EEVE.


'i regret -- my apologies -- i reely must go' said hewbert. but to proodens grate surprise he first fell to one nee took her hand kissed it got up and strode away towards the stabel blokk without as much as looking at her.

yuo kno sumtyms i forget wat a jeenyus i reelie am. thank hevens notburga is ther to reemynd me. okay so now let us turn to poor old sharlot wat is she up to eh?

the bodis riper!!!
part the third because we hav no number to deenote 1+2
chapter six


sharlot had had a verie x-syting but frustrayting day. being summoned from the attik being n-gaged temporayrilie as the laydys mayd of her masters sister the famuosly beeooteeful dowayjer duchess of paisley being taken by her to the very doors pewsey huose were all moments of joyful astonishment. but she had also bene shokked by the rood dekor in the duchess bedroom disappoynted to hav been left in the karrij and intimidayted to find herself always under the eye of the jigantik mrs harvey wen abuv all things she wanted to fynd her master. altho the kind duchess had ashoored her that the hon the rev mr robinson was beter sumthing insyd her mynd wud not be satisfyed until she saw for herself. altho she was a good girl and loyal and knew her plais and didnt kick up any presbie fuss abowt working for pixies sharlott was after all a skot so not so super-fewdal that she refewsed to think for herself.

as sune as she had returned to the huose with her noo mistress--not that sharlot thot of her that way as she had vayglie begun to think of proodens in this roll--sharlot was handed over to mrs harvey whoo looked her up and down sniffing and putting her hand on her shulder proppelled her back to her grays' rood bedchaymber.

the fat amorus and paygan gods and goddesses all seemed to stayr at her as if she wer the 1 so roodlie dressed as mrs harvey led her to a set of door wich wen opened reveeled a grate chaymber lined with glorius dresses caypes coats tippits furs skarvs and amazing hats topped with feethers from all sorts of newly diskovered x-otik birds shortlie to becom x-tinkt. at the far end of this room was a wooden stool under a sunny windo.

'i suppose you can sow a strait seem' sed mrs harvy 'or are you good for 0 but dusting?'

'ook ay indeed ah can sow mrs harvey' sed sharlot teering her awed eies away from the glorius fabriks. 'all kinds of stitches and buttonholes too'

'well then you can set to work repairing my shifts and stokkings' sed mrs harvey suddenly slapping a mowntain of yelloed cotton into sharlots arms.'im so run off my feet i havnt had the tym to do them myself. and mynd yuo dont budj until they are all done. if yuo do there will be hell to pay.' she luiked kraftily at the haf-burried girl. 'sumtimes wen i am in her grays' bedroom i hav the unkomfortabul feeling im being wached. don't you?'

'ook' sed sharlot and the har stood up on the bakk of her nek. mrs harvey luiked at the girls rownd eies and hid a smyl. she didnt bother lokking the bedroom dor or her way out.

sharlott took the pyl to the windo and began to soo as if her lyf depended on it. she tryed not to think aboot the rood and skary payntings on her grayces seeling. her first master mr robisons brother henry had payntings lyk that in his hoam and sharlott hadnt lyked them either. still they seemed mor respektable in the drawing room of a marreed cuppel than in the bedroom of a yung wido. she herself wud not want micheal mcintyr to see her in a room lyk that.

at the very thot of micheal mcintry in sutch a room sharlott blushed and her hart flutered almost as quiklie as her needel. for the first tym in howrs she thot agane of the prisoners in the attik and wondered wy they had bene lokked up. she knoo that in some grate huoses the servants wer lokked up after dark and in others like those of the robinsons any door between the mens and wimmens sydes were lokked permanentlie. howevr nevr had she herd of servants being lokked up arownd the clokk to do 0 but eat and fret. cud it be that her laydyship did not kno of the stayt of the attik?

another thot that trubbled sharlot was wy she had been sumoned from teh attik to begin with. if it was becuz it was too rood for her to be lokked in an attik with all thos men--not that they werent all as kind to her as brothers--then wy did the duchess konsent to sleep under a seeling of such rood gods and goddesses?

'one thing i ken for sertan' sed sharlot alowed 'my deer master wud never alow such rood fowk in his bedroom.'

ther sudenly kaym a thump and a hevy tred of footsteps in the bedroom and the terrified sharlott suddenly thinking she had majikally offended the paytings mufled a shreek. but it was only mrs harvey of corse kross and puffing lyk a bellos.

'mayk hayst and help me' sed mrs harvey. 'her grays is going for a dryv. we nede her dryving habit.'

sharlot obedientlie skurried to her syde and tuched a green bodis with rather marshall golden braid.

'this 1?' she asked.

'beter not' sed mrs harvey as if to herself 'not if shes drying with that pewsey chit. lady proodens will probably were red or bloo and we doant want them to klash. fynd me her grays's chokit brown blakkie.

dryving with laydy proodens! sharlots hart gayv a mitey bownd and she tryed to keep her voys stedy as she sed.

'will her grays with me to attend upon them?'

'wat? a joonior ladies mayd to attend her grays iin the park? to do wat? ryd postilion? goodness grayshus wat a stoopid girl. the deer knos wat a mess yuov been mayking of my shifts!'

she waddeled over to chekk and as sharlot reverentlie serched among the delikate finery for a choklit brown dryving habit she held her breth.

'not bad' sed mrs harvey grudjingly. 'kredit were kredit is doo. hmm. i mite trust yuo with her grays's own things at this rayt. and wil yoor at it better look up her graces new ruby supper ensemble. lady proodens will probably ware gold or bloo.'

'lady proodens-- heer!' squeeked sharlot.

she was rewarded with a ringing slap!

'yuo mind yore own bizness' sed harvey furius at herself for letting that slip. 'i kollekt yuo hav gotten lady proodens in all sorts of trubble. taken all sorts of libertees! well that woant hapen heer beleev yuo me.'

and taken the choklit skirt and bodis from sharlot she waddeled to the door.

'mynd yuo dont leev this room until given leev!' she added.

sharlot returned to her chare face burning. she had not been slapped sins she left the kitchens of the her masters brother the erl of bo. and in the unwritten coad of servis she ot not to hav bene slapped by mrs harvey not if she were a laydies made. and even as the parlermayd of her beloved master... the thot mayd teers come to her eies. if only she cud see the master. watevr her grays sed shurly her master wud not want his staff lokked up in an attik or she sharlott to be trapped in this attik by skary rood payntings! nyther wud lady proodens approv if she knoo.

eventchuly she wyped her eies. the sun was rather low in the sky and soon she wud not be abel to see well enuff to sow. she kaym to the konklushon that watevr she did she wud not do until after dark had mayd her sowing skills yoosless. she was little and fast with a soft tred. she cud heer mrs harvey coming but mrs harvey wud not heer her.

'and even so' sed sharlot dryving the spectre of the rood painted peeple fro her mynd, 'i will fynd my beloved master'.

to be kontinewed.


4 comments:

Jam said...

Xellent finaly som pichers lol

Magdalena said...

What a nice picture, notburga! More, please!

And I'm so curious about what's going to happen next! I hope Sharlot and Proodens will sort it all out...
(My inner child is completely suppressed right now as I am feverishly working at my phd thesis. Thank you so much, Seraphic's inner child, for the refreshing break from my work!)

sciencegirl said...

i am not sher how sharlot will save the day, but i think her resoursecefulness will soon put an end to the evil clementyn's machinations! may i say i am also happy that classic, essential skills like sewing are shown as valuable and not burdensome? so many stories i have read recently depict girls complaining about their sewing tasks ...

Sheila said...

I have no idea what sharlot will do next, but I have complete faith in her!